Finding Your Parenting Style

Let’s be real, parenting is one wild ride especially when you decide to choose a parenting style. From the moment you hold your baby, the world bombards you with advice: “Sleep train by six months!” “Don’t let them cry!” “Discipline this way!” “No, do it that way!” It’s overwhelming.

But here’s the truth: there’s no single “right” way to parent. The best parenting style? The one that works for you and your child. So, take a deep breath. Let’s explore how you can figure out your unique approach to raising a happy, well-adjusted little human.

Why Your Parenting Style Matters (But Isn’t Set in Stone)

The way you parent shapes how your child sees the world, forms relationships, and handles challenges. But parenting isn’t about sticking to a rigid playbook, it’s about adapting. What works for one kid might not work for another. And what works today? It might need tweaking tomorrow. That’s okay.
The key is to be consistent but flexible, loving but firm, and above all, true to yourself.

The 4 Main Parenting Styles (And Why You Don’t Have to Pick Just One)

Experts typically break parenting into four categories, but honestly, most of us mix and match. Here’s a quick rundown:

1. Authoritative (The Balanced Approach)
   • You set rules but explain why.
   • You expect respect but also listen.
   • Your kid feels safe, understood, and guided.
   🚀 Best for: Building confidence, responsibility, and emotional intelligence.
2. Permissive (The “Fun Parent” Approach)
   • You’re big on love, low on rules.
   • Your kid feels free but may struggle with boundaries.
   ⚠️ Good in moderation, but kids still need structure.
3. Authoritarian (The Strict Parent Approach)
   • Rules are rules, end of discussion.You value obedience over negotiation.Your child may become disciplined but might struggle with expressing emotions.
   💡 Can work in small doses, but warmth and communication are key.
4. Uninvolved (The “Figure It Out” Approach)
   • Kids have full independence.
   • Little guidance, few expectations.
   • This style can leave children feeling lost.
   🚨 Kids need engagement—if you’re overwhelmed, seek support (no shame in that!).

How to Discover What Works for YOU

1️⃣ Think about how you were raised.

• What did you love? What would you change?
• Parenting patterns run deep—be intentional about what you carry forward.

2️⃣ Pay attention to your child’s personality.

• Some kids thrive on structure, others need freedom.
• Adjust based on their needs, not what a parenting book says.

3️⃣ Set core values, but be flexible.

• What’s non-negotiable in your home? (Respect? Honesty? Independence?)
• Everything else? You can figure it out as you go.

4️⃣ Trust yourself. Seriously.

• If you’re showing up, loving your child, and doing your best—you’re doing great.

You’re Not Alone—Let’s Talk About It!

Parenting isn’t meant to be done in isolation. That’s why we started the “Finding Your Parenting Style” Podcast on Spotify. Every week, we break down real-life parenting struggles, interview experts, and share stories from parents just like you.

🎧 Listen now on Spotify: Finding Your Parenting Style Podcast

Final Thought: There’s No Perfect Parent (Just the Right One for Your Child)

You don’t have to be a textbook-perfect parent. Your child doesn’t need perfect, they just need you. The fact that you’re reading this, thinking about your parenting style? That’s proof you’re already an amazing parent.

Now, go hug your little one and remind yourself: you’ve got this.

“Don’t go through mumming alone.”
FK Jesuyode
Founder, 5StarMums